Bad game, bad ump, bad fans, great day!

I was at the Twins' 9-3 loss against the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim today. I got a nice deal from a friend on two tickets, so I took my 11 year-old daughter to her first game at Target Field.

Despite umpire Jerry Layne blowing a call at home, much like a little league umpire would because the ball beat the runner, the Twins deserved this loss. This happened even though Layne was positioned to see it, as Jason Kubel slid under the tag.

I was more upset at a mother, who decided to take our seats with her daughter and two sons while we went up for some refreshments. There were five of us, including my daughter and me, and the mother simply had one of her kids move down a row when my daughter and I returned, while the rest of our party was in the Town Ball Tavern (for the air conditioning).

This was only the third inning. Then, when a different party returned to the seats to where her one son moved, she just moved her son to a different row and had him take her other son with. When the others in our party came back (the sun went behind the stadium, so we were now shaded), she and her daughter went with her boys to yet another row, several rows down from ours.

I would have been embarrassed if I were the kids, but they didn't seem to have a clue of what ballpark etiquette is. One of them stood up in front of my daughter's view for several pitches while he dug in his pocket for a dollar bill.

I should have said something, but I pitied the woman, with her horrible hygiene, her greasy, unkempt hair, and overall social deficiencies. Mostly, I pitied the children, who have to be raised by this woman.

Late in the game, a man and his three boys came down to sit in our row. That's a little more understandable, as many had left because of the lopsided score. Still, this guy looked like he should have had a clue, and he moved right next to one of our party members, while the other two were away getting more refreshments. He was told the seats were taken, and thus just moved down two seats.

I'm not going to be so kind next time this happens. If the stadium is less than half-full, like PNC Park at Camden Yards when I was there Thursday night (yep, I moved to better seats, because the usher told us to sit anywhere we wanted in that section), I don't have a problem with this. But when it's a sell-out, and you get busted once, move on. It takes a lot of nerve to just move over into other seats you also obviously did not pay for. Or just obtuseness. It's awful parenting, too.

Another reason I didn't say anything this time was because I was with my daughter, and nothing could bug me that much when I'm having quality time like that. I enjoyed the day. She got a nice lunchbox as a promo, we enjoyed some treats and sunshine, and got a few laughs over the odd woman and her odds-against-them-in-life children.

I recommend this to everyone: When someone is doing something that normally ticks you off, it's not too difficult to change your mindset and make it for an entertaining moment, or afternoon at the ballpark, even.

How Do They Keep Their Jobs?

This is beneath me, but I just need to memorialize the ineptitude of another major league baseball umpire tonight. Mike Winters, who might have been qualified to fill-in as a last minute replacement for a little league no-show tonight, was absolutely brutal. If you can find Justin Morneau's fourth inning at bat somewhere on the net, check it out.

It's not the only example, but it's pretty comical to see in a matter of seconds, with strike two on an outside pitch, and strike three on the inside, an umpire's hallucination of a 26-inch-wide plate.

Winters was so bad, I'll even forgive Brian Runge for his erroneous showing-up of Nick Punto on the pick-off call at first.

To Slide Into First or Not

Apparently, Nick Punto is being stubborn about sliding into first base, as he has been wont to do for several years. This is much to the dismay of many Twins fans and media-types, and I suppose other baseball fans who think that you just don't do that, because, well, everyone knows you don't.

But consider these points:

1) It has never been proven that NOT sliding is better, it has only been passed down for years as "studies show" or "everyone knows" hearsay.

2) On a throw that pulls the first baseman off the bag, the head-first slider is immeasurably more difficult to get out with a sweep tag. You will commonly see this type of throw on a hurry-up play, a play that is likely to be close, yet the runner doesn't quite know HOW close, like a high-chopper or a bunt...the type of play in which Nick commonly finds himself.

Bottom line...if you know how to slide head-first without getting hurt (which, by the way, is the SAFEST base to slide into), go for it.

If you are Justin Morneau, step on the bag and head to the dugout. You'll get 'em next time.

I would not, however, recommend sliding into first in recreational softball. On the bang-bang plays in which the fielder has made an on-target throw to first, most umpires will likely have the old "everyone knows you don't do that, therefore I'm calling you out for doing that" mentality. You may occasionally avoid a sweep tag on poor throws, but it is still at best a wash, and just not worth it for us wannabes.

Oh, and in case anyone wants to submit the argument that you don't see sprinters diving head-first at the finish line, consider these three points:

1) It isn't exactly slide-friendly dirt on the other side of the finish line
2) They DO stick out their chests, an act which detracts from proper sprinting form (thus slowing them down, to borrow from the anti-sliders' logic)
3) Sometimes they do